June 27, 2008

"Gay Marriage is Good for America"

One of the last places I thought I would find an op-ed with that title was the Wall Street Journal, but here it is.

Re-enter your childhood, but imagine your first crush, first kiss, first date and first sexual encounter, all bereft of any hope of marriage as a destination for your feelings. Re-enter your first serious relationship, but think about it knowing that marrying the person is out of the question.

Imagine that in the law's eyes you and your soul mate will never be more than acquaintances. And now add even more strangeness. Imagine coming of age into a whole community, a whole culture, without marriage and the bonds of mutuality and kinship that go with it.

What is this weird world like? It has more sex and less commitment than a world with marriage. It is a world of fragile families living on the shadowy outskirts of the law; a world marked by heightened fear of loneliness or abandonment in crisis or old age; a world in some respects not even civilized, because marriage is the foundation of civilization.

This was the world I grew up in. The AIDS quilt is its monument.

Few heterosexuals can imagine living in such an upside-down world, where love separates you from marriage instead of connecting you with it. Many don't bother to try. Instead, they say same-sex couples can get the equivalent of a marriage by going to a lawyer and drawing up paperwork – as if heterosexual couples would settle for anything of the sort.

Even a moment's reflection shows the fatuousness of "Let them eat contracts." No private transaction excuses you from testifying in court against your partner, or entitles you to Social Security survivor benefits, or authorizes joint tax filing, or secures U.S. residency for your partner if he or she is a foreigner. I could go on and on.

Marriage, remember, is not just a contract between two people. It is a contract that two people make, as a couple, with their community – which is why there is always a witness. Two people can't go into a room by themselves and come out legally married. The partners agree to take care of each other so the community doesn't have to. In exchange, the community deems them a family, binding them to each other and to society with a host of legal and social ties.

That last point is so very important. When we got married, Apostle Dale brought not only the two of us into the vows, he included the congregation, our personal community that included family and friends. Not only did we commit to each other, they committed to acknowledge the sacred bond we now held and to support it any way they could.

Marriage can not be successful in a vaccum. The vaccum, rather, has been the lack of that right being afforded to same-sex couples. Praise the Lord that momentum has started to swing in favor of that changing.

Click here to read the rest of the Wall Street Journal piece.

1 comment:

  1. Alright...someone must have taken the Journal's brain and transplanted it with another! And why didn't it happen sooner?!

    Thanks,

    Don

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