Report on American Family Outing Visit to Saddleback Church

From Soulforce.org:

Eight of our families met with Saddleback ministers and staff for lunch and conversation. Saddleback staff shared their efforts to reduce hurtful language in their materials on gays and lesbians and their passion for HIV/AIDS prevention. However, they also explained that gay and lesbian people are welcome to attend but may not serve the church unless they commit to celibacy.

In an attempt to explain the harm that these kinds of policies can cause, members of The American Family Outing -- which included former Exodus spokesperson Darlene Bogle and born-again Christian transman Kimrey Kotchik -- shared their personal testimonies. Speaking as a straight married man, Bob Bednar asked the Saddleback group to imagine what it would be like to live without hope of intimacy, companionship, or the touch of a partner.

After the meeting, Bob shared this reflection: "Being there showed me in a powerful way exactly how brave my LGBT team members were to go into that kind of atmosphere and insist that church leaders recognize their pain and start to see it as their own pain, too. But the experience also showed me how far we have to go before churches will actually be able to 'own' that pain and take responsibility for the spiritual violence they perpetuate, sometimes without even knowing it. They see the pain, but they don't seem to understand that the pain doesn't come from being LGBT but from trying to reconcile being LGBT with a theology puts conditions on who people can be and who they can be with."

While it is difficult to know if our stories fell on receptive ears, we do know that the families of the American Family Outing brought their spirit of love and integrity to mega-churches where LGBT people are not yet affirmed. They also opened a larger conversation about LGBT people and the church in every community that we visited.

Click here to read the rest of the report from Soulforce, right below the stories of how three leaders of the orgainzation got legally married in California last week.